Your Mindset is Starving You Sarah Perl

0:00And this is something no one talks about is like because everyone talks about, okay, here's how to get to a million dollars. Here's how to get to this. Here's how to get to that. No one talks about what happens after. Okay. So, what does embodying your future self look like to you in order to

0:16manifest the life of your dreams? Embodying your future self. Oh my gosh. Well, wo. I mean, embodying your future self. I feel like for me, it's really recognizing like what is the identity of the version of me that has what I want. How does she walk? How does she talk? Does she have the same friends? Right? Does she call people to the same, you know, the same way? Like, every single aspect of your life, I think, changes when you embody your future self down to like your daily routine, where you're getting your coffee, you know, everything. What are you wearing? I think um for me embodying my future self

0:53has always looked like really aligning myself with the thought process that my future self has as well and yeah just like bridging the gap between where you are today and where you want to go and just like jumping right into that energy. That's so cool. So do you like I was just thinking as you were saying that do you just like write a list of who that of that what that person does? Like for an example, where you get your coffee, like some people might be like, "Okay, you can go to like Duncan." Not [ __ ] on Duncan, but like maybe your future self goes to like this bougie

1:24coffee shop that you like want to be aligned with every day. So, you like write down all the details of what this future self does. Yeah. And then you just start aligning with it. You know, the way I do it is I I kind of like roleplay. Um some people call it like method acting. like pretend you are literally you have like a camera crew following you and they're doing a documentary on your life and um yeah just like how would this version of you if you were acting as her act? And um honestly for me I I mean I don't necessarily write a list but what I do

1:56do is what it's called um sorry I'm like all over the place um what I do is I do this method called scripting where you write kind of like a diary entry from your future self um and really get in tune with her. The other thing that I think people forget is at least for me I think my intuition is like whispers from my higher self, whispers from my future self. And so a big part of like bridging the gap between where you are today and where you want to go is giving yourself permission to listen to that voice inside of you and not letting yourself

2:26silence it. Um, too often I think we move based on our circumstances and we don't move based on our intuition and what our true desires are. Um, and I think that's been like the fastest way I've like quantum leaped in my life. I love that. Yeah. And what I've realized too is that like everyone has their different way of doing it like that would align with them. Like for an example, my sister does scripting and for some reason for me I literally no matter how many times I've done it, I cannot feel it. Like I don't get in the

2:55vibe for it for some reason. And so I feel like that was a big eye opener for me that I have to like also tweak it and keep trying new things until something feels aligned and then I feel like okay this works for me. Yeah. Um, but I think there's there's like obviously vis vis visualizing and then maybe it is like like writing that list and being like, "Okay, this is what this person does every day." And then you just follow that list. You're like,

3:20"Okay, I'm going to this coffee shop. Okay, this is actually me." Yeah. You know, like I remember someone um one of my when I was uh going on a business trip, they bought us first class tickets when I was like didn't have the money and so forth. And I sat in that the first class being like this is my life, you know? So like those little experiences like taking it on and

3:42starting to like actually maybe feel it. Maybe some people have to do that. Some people can script. Some people like say it to themselves in the mirror, right? Like affirming. Um but yeah, that was a big eye openener for me is like I had to keep switching things until I could figure out what it was. Um, another point you mentioned to me that or you just mentioned that I thought was so good is like who are your friends? Do they hang out with the same

4:05people? That's a good one. Yeah. I mean, and I think even to your example of like being in first class and like envisioning it. I feel like for me what I've noticed is like a big part of leaping into a new reality is like giving yourself permission to be in certain rooms, be in certain positions. Because I think um one of the things I teach is like you have to normalize things. like you can't attract what feels uncomfortable, what you feel like you don't deserve. And so like being in that first class seat or like whatever it is, right? Or you know putting yourself in that coffee shop. I think

4:36what it's doing is it's normalizing certain experiences for you and so your nervous system feels like regulated and is like wait this is my new reality and like you start to call in opportunities and say yes to opportunities that will open those doors for you. For sure. Yeah. Like I was thinking randomly the other night. I was like I remember back even to do a podcast episode. I'd be like, "Okay, I can't sleep. I'm thinking

4:58about it and I'm just go right into it." Because you get then used to these things and you normalize it and then it's like everyone trusting that they will get to that place. It's like initially it feels uncomfortable for everyone and just like write that new reality and start to make it not feel so

5:15unachievable which is a huge piece. 100%. Yeah. and and you kind of go into a lot which I loved I when I was watching your Instagram is you go also into a lot of like your body and like attachment to foods which was a huge one for me too. I had that I had my own journey with that and and releasing control over my food and it was like an addiction and so break us down like your experience what you went through and I feel like it's so helpful

5:40for people. Yes. Oh my gosh. I mean, I think what's so interesting is so much of the discussion around weight loss, dream body, all of this stuff with summer coming up, it's so much of like the logic, right? It's like do this, do that, and you're going to get this, right? But I think people forget it's like I know what I have to do. I just don't know how to do it. I I can't get myself to do it. And usually that's the result of like your mindset, right? So, for me, what was happening was I was like, I really I would look in the mirror and I'd be like, this is not the

6:09body I meant to be in. And I think like anyone who's been on a weight loss journey knows that feeling of like looking in the mirror and being like this is not a physical representation of the soul, like my the physical presence of my soul. Um, and so I knew that in order for me to lose weight, I'd have to eat less. I'd have to walk more. I'd have to do all these things, but I

6:29literally couldn't get myself to do it. I'd constantly feel hungry. I'd constantly have cravings. And I was like, I wonder why I feel this way. Cuz like, why are certain people not craving food? Why are certain people not hungry? Why are certain people satiated and I'm not? And I realized actually there were a lot of um there were a lot of there was a lot of overlap between my weight loss mindset and my mindset around money. For example, I had like I grew up with literally nothing. And so when I started making a ton of money, I was

6:58like, "Oh my god, I still feel poor." And it was such an interesting feeling because it's like no matter how much I had, I felt like I never had enough. And I noticed that with my weight loss journey. It was like no matter how much I eat, it's never enough. And so I realized this root problem of scarcity mindset is going to ruin my life. It's ruining my body. It's ruining my bank account. It makes me feel like I'm not deserving of certain things. It makes me feel like I'm not satiated in life. Even in my love life, I noticed, you know, like I felt like there was a scarcity of

7:26men in the world and I would never find the kind of man I want, right? And so I think one of the worst mindsets you could ever have is a scarcity mindset because um it prevents you from ever truly being satisfied. And in order to lose weight, in order to have your dream body, you have to get to a point where you're like, I am okay and I don't need food, um, and don't need this overabundance of food because there actually is an abundance. It's interesting. What I mean to say in all of that is like the way to lose weight, people think it's through scarcity,

7:56right? Like limiting your options. But I actually found that I lost the most amount of weight when I gave myself the most amount of options. And I made myself aware of, wait, I am not in scarcity. I have Uber Eats on my phone. I have food in the fridge. I have all this food in front of me. I'm don't need to eat it right now because it's still going to be here tomorrow and it's still going to be here next Tuesday. Like I think the reason, you know, a lot of people tend to gain weight. Why I gained weight was I was like, "Oh my god, I

8:21have this cookie jar and I have to finish all the cookies right now versus being like, you know what, there's an overabundance of this food. I can eat it any day of the week." And so that was kind of how I lost weight was just like creating abundance mindset and getting to the root of like why am I hoarding this food? Why um why don't I believe I'm capable of walking 10k steps? Do I even believe I'm deserving of the body I want? Like can I even identify with the version of do I even know what it feels like to have that? So I think that's

8:48where you start to bridge the gap and then you call in that new reality. That's so cool. Wow. That was you said a lot of really good things. One of the things for me when you were speaking that I was like it's so aligned was I was the exact same when I started releasing my attachment to food. And it's wild that there's no like there's not as much information out

9:06there about that. Yeah. And and I was like okay cuz my sister always was able to eat whatever she wants. Didn't even think about it. She's always been so naturally skinny growing up. All my like not they were lovely parents but they'd always be like oh t or t my sister's so skinny she can eat whatever she wants. I'm like, "Oh, Tara loves her food." And I'm like, "It's not like a good thing to constantly imprint in my head." So then I thought started to think I had a problem and all the stuff, whatever. And so then I started to realize I was like tracking everything I ate. Like, "Oh, I can't eat

9:37that. Oh, wow. That looks so good. They're so lucky they can eat that." And it's like putting it on a pedestal now. It's so amazing. You can never have that. So now you want it way more than you would have if you could have it. And so what you just said too was like the shift is like the abundance of food. And that is exactly now where I've gotten to now. Like I'll get to a place where I'm like

10:00okay I know I can eat whatever I want. Like almost restricting yourself more is like the opposite which was what you said. It's like putting I'm on a diet. I have now I have to watch what I eat. All that stuff makes you way more hungry. Makes you want it way more. puts it on a pedestal and actually gets you very out of tune with your body, right? Like cuz you once you start to feel like you can have whatever, you then kind of get to a place where you release the control and then you actually listen to your body like am I actually hungry now or is

10:31it out of like a necessity? Yes. You stop acting from a place of survival mindset and you start acting out of abundance, out of desire. I think it's also interesting because I think a lot of the rheto rhetoric around weight loss is like it has to be so hard like it's you suffer and it's like difficult and it's hard and honestly that mindset got me nowhere because who wants to do something they don't want to do? Who wants to do something that's a pain in the ass? Like I convinced my subconscious to believe that losing weight, going on 10k steps, um and whatever I had to do was actually really

11:03pleasurable and fun and I made it fun. Like you can make it fun. Like I think people forget that part. Um, but another thing like to the scarcity stuff is like um, you know, one day it really hit me where I don't know about you, but like I grew up hearing constantly like finish your plate, like don't waste food, right? So I'd be like, oh [ __ ] like I

11:21shouldn't waste this food. And so, but those extra bites, they add up. You know what I mean? And so I had this like epiphany where I was like like the food's going one of two places. It's either going in my body or it's going in the trash can. And my body is not a trash can. like if I'm treating if I'm eating this extra food that I don't even want when I feel full, I'm literally treating my body like a trash can. And so that like mindset really like shifted my understanding of like

11:46that's huge. Yes, that's a great one. Yes. I know, dude. I was like, what? But it's true. It's like and I feel like I don't know. I feel like people can relate to that in so many areas of life. It's not just like weight loss. It's like love life, you know, like or how are you treating your body and other, you know, other

12:04things in life. So, yeah, that's huge. And you're so right. It starts to and there's um I don't know if you've heard of Danny Morell, but one of his quotes that I love the best is like if you're settling in one area of your life, like say you're just settling in your romant your romantic life. You're also settling is an energy. So, you're settling in all areas of your life. So, like how you said the scarcity part, it's like, okay, well, what other areas am I feeling the

12:29same way? It's interesting because it's us. It's our energy that we're showing up to in multiple areas. Yes. And I also think it's interesting too because a big part of weight loss is I for me it was like I realized I had extreme control issues and I was constantly in my masculine energy. I felt like I had to control everything. I felt like I always had to be on. I felt like um you know like I felt like I had to constantly be doing doing doing. And um in order for me to lose weight, I realized I had to step into like feminine energy and be able to like

12:59detach and trust. Like that was a big thing. Like I just didn't trust anything or anyone. Like I didn't trust people. I didn't trust the universe. Um I didn't trust like I don't know maybe as a business owner you relate. Like it was hard for me to trust team members even you know. And that like seeped into my body as well cuz I didn't even trust my body to release the weight. Like I felt like I had to constantly be like constricting and holding on. And so much of weight loss is literally just letting

13:23go. So true. Yes. Yeah. That's so powerful. Yeah. Cuz the root of like the weight is holding on. It's holding on. Your body is physically holding on and energetically and everything. Yes. And I mean, if you really think about it too, it's like cortisol. Like cortisol is like stress. It's, you know, it's a hormone that's making you not necessarily gain weight, but it's making it harder for you to release weight. And so, and so much of weight loss is done through sleep, too. So, it's like you start to realize like where in your life are you letting yourself go? Are you, you know, in a deficiency mindset? And

13:56you start to very quickly see like this is why my body gained the weight in the first place. And something I want to say to people too is like I hated my body at first. I was like why would it gain weight? It hates me. My body is working against me. Your body is holding on to the weight because it loves you because

14:09it's protecting you from so many things. So it thinks right. You just haven't convinced your body that you're actually safe without the weight. And so um one of the ways I saw this is like I started drinking a lot because I had extreme social anxiety. So, I was like, "Oh, you know, before I go hang hang out with my friends or like before I go on a date, let me take a couple shots." And those couple shots add up and then I'm gaining weight. And it's like my body was protecting me from social anxiety, but that developed into weight gain. And so, all of the ways I've noticed that my

14:37body gained weight was was a sort of like protective mechanism that I didn't need. And so, the more I convinced my body, I was like, I'm actually safe. I'm okay. I'm full. I'm like like everything's okay just as is. And I trust the universe. like I release control. I another thing I, you know, had to do was like release the how. Like I thought it has to be this way. I have to go to the gym. I have to do this or Pilates. And it's like, no, I could just literally call my friends and go on a walk and that's literally enough. So,

15:06exactly. It's just crazy. It's It's releasing the pressure of what it needs to look like is a huge one. Like cuz when I had so much pressure of like I have to work out to like get this way, I actually like was forcing myself to do it rather than I'm going to go because it makes me feel good or I'm just going to go on like going from a place of like like your feminine energy like more soft

15:26and in the moment and enjoying it more. It's you release the pressure and now you're doing it because you're like no, I'm going to go because it makes me feel good today. Yes. You know, rather than I'm doing it to achieve some goal. It's like masculine what you were just saying. Um, how did this relate to you in your u money mindset because I have that I have a

15:45similar thing with the scarcity thing. Yeah. Um, so I mean for me like and I'm still dealing with this to an extent like and I think every entrepreneur probably does um like obviously I had this fear of like not even fear I just never felt satiated like no matter how much I made no matter how many followers I gained I felt this sense of like one it could all go away. I think like every

16:09everyone has that fear, right? That's a scary one. I hate that. Like what if tomorrow everything changes, but um but also I think the biggest thing was like I never felt satiated. Like I never felt like this is enough. And I think a lot of that was because of again masculine energy like living in the future rather than being present and being like this is the exact like this is my my life right now like enjoy it, experience it, like breathe through it, you know. Um, and actually like right now is the most satiated I've ever felt. Even though I'm not making necessarily as much, I'm still making a

16:42good amount. Like I'm not making like as much as I could be making. But how rich I feel is like that's true wealth. It's like how rich do you wake up feeling. You could have all the money in the world, but if you wake up with anxiety and this feeling of impending doom, that's not wealth, you know?

16:58Yeah. It's so true. It's not abundance. You're not on the frequency of abundance. Yeah. And you actually attract more when you're in that place. So you're like aligning yourself with such a happier life with all your dreams. Um that's so interesting. Yeah, I feel like I've I've noticed that too. It's like I constantly And you're right. I think a lot of entrepreneurs feel the same way because that's kind of like the root of why they strive so hard is because they're the instability, the feeling of financial instability or scarcity. It's like go go go next next cuz you're just

17:31so scared of not having enough. Yeah, it's a lot. I know. It's a lot of pressure. It is. Yeah. But I mean, I don't know about you, but like for me it's like I've literally made the most amount of money when I'm having the most fun. Like when I'm so in flow, I'm like this just feels so like like such a [ __ ] yes. And I go for it and that's when I make the most amount of money. It's usually not. And go, you know, going back to like the how. I mean, every time I've done something because I thought it would make me the most money in the

17:58sense of like what other people are telling me, it's never been what made me the most amount of money. What's made me the most amount of money is honestly most of the time being a trailblazer, creating something that no one else has created just because something in my intuition was saying like you need to make this. This feels right. This feels aligned. Um, and I I really feel like people's wealth, true wealth, like wealth that like their highest form of their their highest form of wealth comes from following their intuition. I've

18:26never seen it not work out that way. I feel like people lose a lot of potential money, happiness, whatever wealth is for them by going with the grain and following what other people are telling them to do versus what they know they want to do. Yeah. And I think that's like Yeah. And I think for me, I have the I have the

18:46biggest fear of having regret. Yeah. Like getting old one day and looking back at your life and then having regret that you didn't do something. And I don't know. I've always had that feeling. So I've always like that thankfully has pushed me a lot cuz I'm so scared to regret in life. Maybe in a past life I regretted a lot or something cuz I've had that since I was a kid. I'm like I always pictured getting old and regretting even as a

19:07kid. I don't know why. Wow. So yeah, that's pushed me to be like, "Okay, go achieve like do things even if it's scary." Yeah. Um but you're right because the opposite going after the things that are not aligned with you is like pushing against the grain like you said like forcing like it's very like masculine energy and then a female energy is the attracting going with the flow like things are aligned your intuition. And it's funny because I was we we keep hearing this more I guess now that like females are being put to the forefront and everything is more about female empowerment, but you hear a lot about

19:43how powerful females were like previously back in the day. Have you seen those things like in the Egyptian times like women like women like rolled? And it's so interesting because I'm like it makes so much sense when you start to like get into your feminine attract from that that like okay masculine is do which is obviously very valuable. Look how much it's created. But then also when you're in your feminine and you're attracting and you're aligned, like the abundance you can create with a

20:11masculine energy to do is like wild. No, it's crazy. And I always say like masculine and feminine is like the the masculine is like building the foundations of a house, but the feminine is what makes it a home. It's the furniture, it's the ambiance, it's the music, it's the home-cooked meal. Like a house with just foundations is nothing

20:29without the feminine energy, you know? And so I think that's like with anything in life, you know, entrepreneurship or your body, you know, like the feminine energy is so important. Yeah. Yeah. The biggest thing for me too and and and we can I would love to hear this for you is like what are you doing because I now have seen like when I work a lot, I sometimes forget to go back into my own like wellness, meditate, align with myself. What do you do to keep yourself aligned or when you know you're not like on track? Like how do you know you're not on track? And then

21:00what do you do to get yourself back on it? Interesting. Cuz I feel like I just got out of this period. I'm not going to lie. I actually just went through a breakup. So, and it's hard. I feel like you have to like in life sometimes um was I going to say like you it's not usually going to feel easy to like get back into alignment if you're in the thick of like it not being

21:21aligned, you know? Mhm. Um, I think a sign of things not feeling aligned is when time's moving really fast for you and you're like you're I blinked and like 3 months passed and where did the time go and you don't feel present. That's usually not um and not in the way of like I think there's a also a difference between like being so in flow that like time flies but in the sense of like what did I even do? Like you're not connected to yourself. Um, feeling out of alignment can look like knowing you deserve better or something not feeling quite like I think when I

21:53feel aligned, I wake up so excited to live. Like I I'm afraid of dying. Like I I'm like the last thing on earth that I want to happen today is like I just don't want to die. Like that that's how I know I'm like fully in flow. I'm like, "Oh my god, I just like want to live forever." Like really, I do. I'm like looking up that what is his name? Brian Johnson where he's like teaching people how to live forever. I'm like, "Okay, let me take notes." But like seriously, and like um and I think people forget like you can change your entire life overnight. Like you truly can. Whether

22:21it's like a breakup or moving to a new city or leaving your job or you know, whatever it is, like you can fall back into alignment very very quickly. And I think when you're really in the thick of it, it doesn't seem like you can. Um and yeah. No, I'm listening. I was scratch. So no, you're good. What was the question

22:38again? Sorry. No, you were. When you can fall back into alignment at any time. That was a really good point cuz a lot of people feel like scared or stuck or there's no way I can do something different. Yeah. And um but yeah to you were asking too on like how I get back into my like

22:53alignment and wellness and everything. Like for me it's um I remember a time in my life where I felt very like honestly the way I explain it is like I feel like I'm on Molly you know like in life. Not that I've ever taken Molly but like that's what I imagine it probably feels like like when you're like oh my god life is so exciting. This is what I'm meant to do. this feels so right. Like the way I'm sure you feel about your career and I feel about my career. I'm

23:15like this is 100% what I'm meant to do. Like no doubt about it. Like I wake up every day and I'm like yes. Like yes, this makes complete sense. And I feel like you want to feel that way about everything. The city you live in, the apartment you're in, the boyfriend you have, whatever. Right. Wow. That's that's that's impactful,

23:35right? It's hard to do that though. I'm even not doing that in every area of my life. But that's like Yeah. But you're so right like you're supposed that then you know something's not align. Yeah. Something's not there. And I think the only reason people don't fall into alignment is scarcity mindset. Going back to that because they think this is the best I can can have or what if I don't find something. And I think you're forgetting how abundant this universe is like hello and how abundant you are to create things that don't even exist. I think that's another thing. Um I I was actually just talking to a friend and I

24:06was telling her like the people with the grandest most abundant mindsets in the world are not the people who have everything. It's the people who are resourceful because if you are a resourceful person you will create things that don't even exist and you will forever be abundant. And I think like even back to my life like I there were so many moments where I didn't have what I needed and I still somehow made

24:26it happen because my mind was abundant. I was resourceful in the mind. And so, um, I think as long as you're a resourceful person, you will you will either find a way or be the way. And I think like those are the people who always win. Um, that's so true. You said you're saying such powerful things. I uh the point also when you said like feeling like a [ __ ] yes in every area of your life, your relationship, your health, your career, I think a lot of that comes from also when I've dug into like spirituality and mental health and all this stuff is like our our ability to

25:03believe that we could also deserve that is like a huge piece of it. Yes. It's like there's like a fear of us not feeling worthy enough to have that which is also Yeah, a lot of people are like, you know, will just stay comfortable like not knowing if they even can believe themselves that they are worthy to have happiness in all these areas or like abundance in all these areas or feeling fulfilled in these areas or feeling like [ __ ] yes, this is the right thing. Like it's like it's it's the lack and scarcity and also the not knowing

25:35their worth. I know. I know. And I think part of not knowing their worth comes from like not believing they're capable of making something happen too. Like I think some people just don't believe they have it in them to create things. And I think that's because I think there are some people who maybe focus more on like they're maybe pessimists and they focus more on like this is where things went wrong in my life versus constantly using every single thing that's gone right in your life as affirmation to your ability to create things. You know, like every single thing, sorry. Every single time

26:06something goes right, I'm like, period. Like the universe on my side. Period. Lucky girl syndrome. Like I constantly reiterate to my mind, it is always working out for me. And I find proof of that every single day, every singlewhere, you know, like. And so I think like when you do that, you activate this part of your brain that starts to believe you're capable of creating things. You're the universe is on your side. Things are working out for you. And it's this like compounding effect where things just naturally

26:32unfold. Yeah. And I love that you're saying that like I'm lucky like it's just a brainwashing yourself and then you start to see the areas that you were lucky and the universe is working for you and you see it more and then things are more aligned and now you're following your intuition better because you're now believing in more. It's all just like first starting with starting with yourself like allowing yourself to believe it because uh a lot of people will say they don't see a sign or they don't feel like the universe is working for them. You have to like almost like get yourself to be a little

27:02delusional at the beginning and just be like I'm so lucky and then something small happens like someone you find a dollar on the floor and it's like I'm so lucky and you might feel like that's stupid in the moment like okay it's just a dollar but you have to like get yourself to believe that you are so

27:19lucky. Oh yeah. And and the second that delusion hits everything is possible. I'm telling you, like I it's like if you don't feel delusional, do whatever you can to get to that state because once you're there, literally nothing can stop you. Like you know, like once that energy activates, you're like, "Oh my god, I could literally do anything. I'll hit up anyone." Like, so yeah, it's a

27:40very powerful energy. Yeah, it's so cool. Is there anything you're currently like learning about yourself or something you're really interested in that you would like to share? Oh my gosh. Well, I think my breakup right now is like super activating for me because talk about that. You know what? It's insane. I I knew that this person, even though he was and and something I think people forget is like just because it's

28:02good, doesn't mean it has to be enough. And I think a lot of people are waiting for catastrophe to change things in their life. They're waiting for crisis to change things. The job is good enough. The relationship is good enough. Um he seems perfect on paper, but something doesn't feel right. Like I think um one of the worst places to be in in life is the golden handcuffs where it's like it feels good but you're handcuffed to a life that you don't want and or just doesn't sit right doesn't feel in alignment like the same way I feel in alignment with my career. I didn't feel that same way with him. And

28:33so it wasn't that anything was bad. In fact like literally all my friends were like this man is perfect. Like you're [ __ ] crazy. Why would you leave him? And I was like you don't get it. It's just I know he's not my husband. I just knew. Wow. And so it was such a hard decision because in that moment I had to break up with him even though literally everyone was saying this is not necessarily the

28:53right decision. That's scary. I know. I know. But I just trust myself. I know if there's one thing in this life that I'm going to like put all my chips in for, it's my intuition because it has never ever ever ever ever steered me wrong. And I I in that moment I realized to like like I was saying earlier, your intuition is literally just your higher self whispering to you. And if you start to silence that, what I noticed until I didn't know notice this until literally this week was I was like, "Oh my god, first of all, my dreams have never been so vivid. My dreams are so vivid. I

29:28didn't dream at all when I was with him." Wow. Weird, right? But then get this, now my intuition is like super loud. I feel so connected to myself. I feel like I can hear my like inner voice again. And I So cool. It's insane. But what I didn't realize, I was like because I silenced this voice inside of me that was saying like you're not meant to be with him or something's off about this. Because I was silencing that one voice, it silenced everything else. I didn't hear any other intuitive download, any other anything about my

30:00intuition. And so I didn't even realize. I was like, "Oh my god, you can't like you cannot silence those." Even down to like there was a time where I was like not aligning with LA. I was like, "Maybe I'm meant to move." And I kept silencing that voice cuz I was like, "Oh, it's comfortable here." Everything was silenced. Like I didn't feel any activation. I didn't feel any energy. I didn't feel inspired. And I was like, "Something's off." It's like, "There's something you're silencing." Like there's one thing you're silencing. Turn the dial up, listen to it, and like act on that. And then you'll start to hear

30:29everything else. Wow. That's really cool. Sorry. I'm like a lot of the [ __ ] you're saying is going deep. No, it's like real. I'm like, um, okay. I'm like trying to cuz it really impacted me. Um, okay. Where do I go with this? That's so true. Yeah, that's interesting because I went for so long I was feeling like that. I was feeling like I couldn't hear my intuition for a while and I was starting to get to a place and I didn't know if it's cuz then I hit 30 and I'm like okay now I'm 30 and life maybe it doesn't feel as exciting anymore because I used

31:03to always be like very excited about life and then I kind of like okay I got a lot of the things I wanted but of course I want so much more but still it kind of got to a place where I'm like okay I would think to myself like okay maybe I just need to switch up the scenery or like go travel somewhere but then there's like nowhere I'd want to go and like who would I even want to go with. And then I'm like, what? So, it's like, okay, now I'm trying to push myself to like get out of this funk, but like nothing felt

31:30exciting anymore. Oh my god. And this is something no one talks about is like because everyone talks about, okay, here's how to get to a million dollars. Here's how to get to this. Here's how to get to that. No one talks about what happens after. And like once you kind of have everything you put on your vision board, no one talks about what happens after you get everything you want because there is this like I I'll never forget and this is such a privileged thing to say, but like I remember there was a time where I was like, "Oh my god, I've visited every country on my bucket list and I don't

31:58know where else I want to go." Like and it was like kind of this feeling of like I lived in anticipation my whole life that I didn't even have a chance to think about what would be on the other side. And like um it's kind of like what's the um the guy who climbs up the mountain? Um I'm not sure

32:16there's it's in philosophy or whatever. I forget. Um oh my gosh, whatever. I'm blinking. But um but no one talks about it. And I think like actually like one of the most depressed periods of my life was when I hit a huge milestone in my business and I was like, "Wait, I feel so empty."

32:31It really is a true thing. I feel so empty. And it's because I realized the the journey like wasn't the or the destination wasn't or what is it? Yeah. The journey wasn't the destination the journey. Is it right or something like that? The the I don't know the destination. Oh, it's not about the destination. It's about the journey. And it really is. And it's about the why. Like I think like this is so stupid, but like my sister right now, she like failed her SAT or whatever. And I was like, and you're going to give this one number the power

33:02to determine how you move tomorrow? you're going to give us, same thing with my weight loss journey. It's like I'd step on the scale, the number would go up, and I'm like, well, I'm giving up. It's like, really, you're going to give a number on a [ __ ] device, the like ability to determine what you're going to do tomorrow? It's like, no, you have to get to a point in life where you're so moved by your convictions and not by your circumstances. And that's where you win, you know? But also, I think I got to a point where I realized like the why is what moves me so much. Like I was

33:31telling my sister I was like you want to like that you want to be a vet and this [ __ ] SAT you're going to remember it one day and you're going to laugh because there's going to be animals lives that you are saving that you're going to what let this SAT decide oh let's let's give up on all these animals it's whatever it's like when you are so moved by your why and you are constantly present and you remember that the journey is the destination in a sense right like that's happiness that's fulfillment that's wealth And I think I didn't know that until I hit that milestone because

34:03it's like everyone says it, but you don't get it until you experience it yourself. I know. And we're all like trying to get there so badly, unhappy when we that we're not there yet, and then unhappy when we don't get it. So, it's like you got to like really appreciate the journey and the why, like you're saying. How did you know for people that feel like touched by what you said about your relationship and leaving when everything seemed good on paper? How did you know like what when your mind was making excuses for staying and when it was your intuition? Because obviously there's so many people in relationships

34:35and they'll be like, "No, but they have this and this and they really love me and this thing and you want to make it work so badly and you're in that place." Like, how do you know the difference? It's a feeling. It's not logic. And I think that's what people forget is they think dating is a checklist. It's like, "Oh, he checks this off. He checks that off." And I was like, he checks everything off, but I don't feel like he checks my heart off, you know, or like I also I think I'm very in tune again with my intuition. So, I think I just always

35:03have had this feeling of how I'm going to feel when I meet my husband and when I feel like my like when I meet my soulmate. And I think in a lot of ways it's also determined by like my friends. Like I think I've had such profound friendships that are so deep that I'm like I don't feel that level of depth with him. And I knew I felt that with many relationships when I'm like have some girlfriends and we like talk for like 14 hours I feel and we're like, "Oh my god, it's 11:00 at night. We've been talking for hours. We

35:32don't even notice." And then I had significant others where I'm like, "What time is it? Okay, it's only been 30 minutes. What are we going to do?" And I was like, "That's a but that's not good." Yes. Like your minds don't align or something. Like I was like, "Something's off." Um, so yeah. I mean, and it's not personal, you know, but I think it was a feeling. And I also, transparently, I knew the first date that he was not going to be my husband. I actually told him I told him on the first date, I was like, I just want you to know I don't want to date you because I already know

36:02you're not my husband. And he was like, he kept pursuing me, pursuing me. And then he gave me princess treatment. I was like, wait, I'll give him a chance. And then I started dating him and I was like, I'm going to date you, but I just want you to know like you're not my husband. And I think in a way having such being so in tune with your intuition is kind of a blessing and a curse because you kind of know how things end before

36:20they even start sometimes. But I I mean I knew I don't think I will I would have met my husband when I meet my husband without him because he taught me a lot of things and I don't think every person has to be forever and I I think that karmic relationships are so real like relationships that come into your life that teach you what you deserve, what is out there, what you want. Um, so I don't think I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing, but um, that's so interesting. I was going to say real quick, um, every relationship that I have had, I always thought cuz like for me, I never

36:56have been like, "Oh my god, this is like the I ne it was always someone that like pursued me and then I gave a chance to." It was never someone that I was like, "Oh, I would love to be with that person." I've always seen that like the ones that I actually am like that about are usually like I find out something like a big red flag or so I've always I've always found love by it being someone that pursued me and like didn't give up and showed those qualities and

37:23then I I slowly grew into love. But I'm like is that not you know I don't know. I think that's the question because I'm trying to figure that out myself because I actually was just around my girlfriends about this. So I was like, "Yeah, like because it's always I've always felt more like the men that I like want but don't necessarily want me back are the ones that I feel like are more like, "Oh, that's my husband." You know, but then it's the guys, but I end up with the guys that pursue me hard, which in a way I think is a good thing cuz feminine

37:50energy period, chase me. Like, but I'm also like, why did you think I was so out of your league that you like went above and beyond to like woo me over? So then clearly there was like an imbalance there or something. And I and I think I don't know. I'm kind of waiting on that connection where we both kind of want each other from the

38:08jump just as much. I think I I'll always want a man to pursue me just cuz period. Yeah. Yeah. That's interesting. And then it was funny cuz one of my girlfriends said in my the last relationship was when I was in it, I kept saying like, "Yeah, but it's probably not the one." Or like, "Yeah, but I kept questioning it the whole relationship." And then I spent so many years with this person and it's kind of like it's it's wild to think that like yeah, you could be saying it from the beginning but then just talking yourself into it

38:39and then waste so much time. No, I know it's I mean and I don't think it's a waste per se. But it is crazy how I think especially as women we just know right away. And I think I also think that like sometimes our opinions of like being in relationships are swayed by people who don't even know what they want or they don't have high standards. Like I'm like to you what he's doing is crazy. To me that's bare minimum. So like I get that you're like obsessed with it and you think it's crazy but I'm like my standards are on a different level you know and I think that my standards are

39:14like that because I know what I bring to a relationship as well you know. So Exactly. And the more you love yourself, the more you work on yourself, the more your standards raise. And I saw that really clearly. Like exactly. I'm like, what in my in my dating life, I was single for like over two years. And I didn't even kiss anyone, nothing. Because the more I worked on myself, the more I was like, there's less and less people that were like aligned that I would feel like are in a place where I was like, okay, that's the one. And so I was like, I

39:44need to be okay. Yeah. With like making my sacred space my sacred space. And then because I'm not just sharing my energy with anyone, my I'm like elevating my energy. I'm attracting better people. And like so that was also a place I went through too. I'm curious because on the note of scarcity, something I've been dealing with because even though I'm a manifestation coach, I'm aware of like where my scarcity mindset can come in is I feel I don't think there's a scarcity per se cuz I think at the end of the day it's like I need one husband and one of he exists somewhere, right? So, but I think like

40:18being a successful woman obviously I want to be with a man who's more successful than me, right? And so what I realized is I'm like, damn, these men who are super successful, they have unlimited options. Whereas me as a successful woman, my dating pool is like tiny because there's only so many. That's what I was going through.

40:35Do you feel that as well? Yes. Yeah. Cuz the more successful you get as a woman, the less um options you have, right? Whereas for them, it's vice versa. Yeah. For them, it's more options. I know. Yeah. Cuz a guy doesn't really need to It's not in a guy's like guys don't feel the need to be taken

40:52care of. They like to take care of you. So then they can literally take care of anyone. The more successful they get. They don't care if you're a waiter or like they don't care if you like teach or what you are. They just are like, "Okay, if you're the right one." Like it kind of is a little [ __ ] up that in life. Like I feel like men have so much more options than women. I don't know if that's just cuz we're living in our

41:13world. It feels like that. I know. Um but yeah. And then I because I've always and that's a big fear of mine too because I've seen my mom get divorced and I've now you know being with her and I've seen her life and my dad got remarried and I see a lot of like women later in life end up more likely to be single than men. Men usually just find someone you know and so that always makes me fearful like I need to make sure I find the right person because I don't want to get divorced and I don't want to be like later in life feeling lonely and like I

41:44didn't end up with the right person. So, it's a lot of pressure, but I think what we always come back to because we have this mindset is like, okay, I just the thing I always tell myself that helps me a lot is like if I exist, someone else exists also. Yeah. Like if I have this depth where I like I like to go really deep. Clearly, you do too because you've had relationships where they're not

42:05that. And I've had the same. Yeah. Um, if I have this depth, if I have this motivation, if I have, you know, this love inside me and I and I'm loyal to to a significant other and I could be this person, then I have to believe there's someone else out there, too. So, you just have to keep going back to being like, you know, I have to just trust that it's going to

42:25come. And I think, too, like even just like seeing my friends, I'm like, if my friends exist, a guy has to exist like that, too. Like I'd marry my friends to be honest if I could. But you know like I feel like and I think it's great cuz I have met men who like do like I've seen enough men to where I've started to believe it exists. I think another big thing that people deal with unfortunately is like um it's hard to normalize something when you don't see it. So you really want to put yourself in rooms like even when in business or whatever it's like you want to put

42:55yourself into spaces where you see exactly what you want and you see other people getting it. And so I started hanging out with women who are in relationships that I like aspire to be in. And I'm like, "Okay, it's somewhere out there. It exists." I love that. Yeah. But obviously it's like scary the scarcity. But honestly, it's like it's really if you break down the numbers, it's not that scarce because even if it is less men, but you only need one, it's still a

43:18lot. So yeah, you don't need a few. Yeah. I don't need a hundred of them. I just need one. Okay. Just one. Oh, it's so beautiful. And I'm so proud of you for actually like committing to yourself. Yeah. Because like we only have one life that we know of. And wouldn't we like to end

43:35it being like, "Wow, I really lived it. I'm so happy with the person sitting next to me and the career that I built and the children that I have." And that's what it's you want to pray that you end up there. And that's really what was the actually, if I'm being honest, the thing that made pulled me over the edge on like the breakup was I was like, I'm tuning into my future daughter right

43:56now and she this is not her father. Wow. And throughout the entire relationship, I was like, I just this is not my daughter's father. And like honestly, I if if I wasn't going to do it for me, I was going to do it for her because I felt like my mom never did that for me. So I was like, I owe it to her to make this decision,

44:15you know, and make the right decision. And also it's like she's not going to exist like the ver, you know what I mean? Like it's like it's really that deep. Like it really is that deep. And I think too it's like so true. Yeah. I mean Yeah. So beautiful like she won't even exist.

44:32So true. It's that deep and I think people forget that. They think it's like dating. It's like whatever. It's yes it is fun and but you know at the end of the day if you're trying to have a family and all the things like there you know and I what I was going to say is like I just love myself too much like not in an egotistical way but I've done so much work on myself and I've grown to love the version of myself that I've become because I have put in so much work to become her that it's like I owe it to me. I owe it to my 12-year-old self to

44:59be with a partner that I feel like I wake up every day being like this is my match, you know? So, it's so true. And then because also too, especially when you're like spiritual or doing mental health and working on yourself constantly and not being afraid to look at your pain so that you can grow into your best version, if you're with someone that's not doing that, it's

45:19so hard. It's so hard cuz you're like, if you only could just see where you're holding yourself back and then you're like a coach full time. Okay. Literally, I was going to just say that like I think the trap a lot of us spiritual girlies get in is we become a man's life coach. And I'm like, "No, I want it the other way around. You be my life coach." Like, and I want to be with an expander. I want to be with a man who like opens my eyes to things that I can't even see, which I I've found with some men, but it's like I feel like it's

45:46a little bit rare, you know? But Yeah. So, Wow. That's so true. And I've been in those relationships. Oh my god. because a lot of men are not in a place to also know that they can explore their feelings or feel comfortable doing that. And I think that the more potentially the more in depth you go with yourself, the more you need

46:04that in a man. Yes. Cuz like the more shut off they are with their emotions, the harder it is for us to like feel connected. Like I I get more and more distant. Yeah. 100%. Yeah. I need an emotionally deep man like that. For sure. Yeah. I'm like, I wonder what guys think about

46:22this. You know, what they even want. You should have a guy on the pod. Like, you know, it's hard to find guys that want to go emotionally deep though. Yes. Or like they think that they're going deep, but it's not like I knew this when I was 10 years old. Yeah. That was for me like growing up. It's always been very important to me to have like success. That's been like my number one thing. And I'm I've always been like hardworking and that was instilled in me by my dad. So like just what I realized as I got older is that I clearly had some sort of like dad wound

46:57but not in the way like not maybe in the way of like needing a man but more in a way like I want my dad to be proud of me. So like because he was such a hard worker I was like okay well I'm going to be a hard worker and I'm going to achieve and I'm going to so I was like that was all I focused on. So like relationships always was like the back burner like if it happens it happens not really as important to me. Um so for me because I have that and it's and and it's funny cuz I I've had um people that

47:28like read your birth charts and they always tell me I have mine very heavily in like what's your big three? Um what does that mean? Like what's your sign? Do you know it? Yes. It's uh my rising is Capricorn, my um sun is Aquarius and my moon is Pisces. Oh my god. Wait, that's such a good mix. Wow. Yeah. And that makes a lot of sense. Capricorn is like I'm a Capricorn

47:48sun, Sagittarius, moon, Leo rising. Oh, wow. So on I feel like we fit that. Yeah. Wow. But what did they say? Yeah. So mainly I I see that it's even in my birth chart that I'm super about success and and that. So for me, it's not attractive, even though I know it's like a very big trigger for men, if there's men listening to to feel like

48:10women only want men that are successful. But the thing for me, and there's some women that I know that don't care about that, that like I know many influencers or business owners that the woman is like the bread winner and they're dating a guy that's not. for me specifically because that's like such an important quality to me and because I want to go

48:28so far in my career beyond this. I feel like I it's attractive to me to have a man next to me that also wants that. Yes. Um because I feel like you are who you date and like you they rub off on you a lot and I want someone that like motivates me to always get up and do it again and so forth. So to me that's a very important one. It hasn't been as important to certain friends of mine and people, but for me that's like a very like I won't even go on a date with you unless I know that you're oh my god. And it's hard because it's

49:00like we're already so successful. It's like [ __ ] like and it's sometimes you think a guy is successful and then you go on a date with him and you're like okay start up like yeah because you want you want you want them to also like and it's okay if they're not fully there yet but you can feel it in the mindset of like how they think. Are they limited? Are they lackful? Like if they're complaining

49:19about they have to be. Yeah. So I think all that stuff it's like I don't want those negative qualities to rub off on me. I can't have that. I've been working myself on the scarcity and limitations for so long. So it's a big one for me. So hard right now. No, because that's the thing is like the reason I think we both need it is because I cannot come home and talk to a man who's like in scarcity mindset and I'm like, "Yo, I've worked literally too hard to to come

49:43back to conversations like this." Exactly. It's just like I just Yeah, exactly. So that's a big one for me. Huge. That's number one. Yeah. And then what I'm realizing more and more is I like the emotional depth one keeps coming up for me. I keep dating men that are not comfortable with um and I was going to make a podcast episode on this because it was a very big eye openener for me. So I'll go into it a whole another time in more depth. But what I realized is I'm attracting men that can't be there with me on emotionally deep level because which was an eye opener came to me a little not

50:18too long ago because who's like that in my life? My dad. He never was connected to me on an emotionally deep level. I always felt like he didn't fully understand me or like he would I would always be misunderstood in situations that I that happened. He'd be like he would look at it the wrong way or not take the time to like really see me because but they always say like you can't you can only see your someone else as far as you've seen yourself or you know so he also hasn't done the work with himself and it's all fine but it's interesting because then that's what I learned love

50:49was I have to keep fighting for you to want to connect with me and open your heart and that's what I've found love is and so I was had this when I was meditating on it I was imagining like oh wow I'm literally like there's all these men that have their their arms open and they're they're connected with their hearts and I'm literally walking up to the guys that are like going like this and be like, "Open your arms. Show me your heart." And I'm like, "Why am I

51:12doing this to myself? It's exhausting." Yes. But isn't it crazy how we just like relive those patterns? Yeah. But it's good to be aware because then now you're like, "Okay, eyes open." Like Yeah. Yeah. So that's another like big thing for me now that I'm like, "Okay, I need to make that more of a priority that I have to feel like someone is going to connect with themselves on a deeper level or look at their wounds. We all have them." Like it's fine to have them. It's like we can love each other through our wounds together and become stronger. So you want someone that does the work, too. I

51:45feel it's another big one. It's a big one. Is someone spiritually open, too? Like I think men are more like biohacking and like self-development. But I'm like whatever you call it just you have to be aware. You have to be aware. Yeah. But honestly I feel like I at least for me I've noticed like men who are very successful are usually there like they've done the

52:04work. That's what got them there, you know? So yeah. Well, some of them that I've dated feel like they don't that getting in touch with their emotions is holding them back. In what way? I actually was going to ask you when you talk about they're not like emotionally deep, like what does that mean to you? Yeah. Like for an example, they feel like, okay, I'm I don't have time to

52:25stop and see like how I feel right now. Oh, and they persevere. They keep going. They just go go. They like, okay, but like you're not saying that like I feel disconnected to you or like you can get this thing that you want so much easier if you just stopped like forcing and you actually like, you know, came from a place of abundance. Like I'm like trying to coach them along the way. I'm like,

52:46"Trust me, you're forcing it right now. You're getting problems because you're doing that." And it's like, they do make it in their lives because they're constant, but they don't realize like what are they exchanging in the process? Their health, their relationships, their love life, their, you know, peace, peace. But then they seek that in women. They're like, "Oh, you got to fix all my

53:06problems, make my food, whatever." Yeah. And then for me, it's like now I'm not I'm not the easy woman to date though because I'm not the girl that's like sitting at home being like, "Oh, you just worked at AK. Okay, let me like massage you and let's just make it easy. We don't have to talk about anything." Like she's like, "I'm not that girl

53:21either." I'm like, "So, what's going on? And how is it? And how do you feel about that? And why do you Okay, but do you see how you're doing this?" And I want to like analyze, go deep. And like they're like, "Geez, I'm just came off work. Just back the [ __ ] up." I can feel that I'm like annoying, but I also like I that's what I do with my own self. Like I work a lot. I then analyze like why are things not working out for me? I do these and I like to have those conversations with people like my best friends and hopefully the person I end

53:52up with. Yeah. So, no, literally I know it. And I think that's like a really I unfortunately I think that's like a very like on a shadow level almost like that's one of my limiting beliefs unfortunately that I'm really working on is like because I'm so driven because I'm so successful I'm not going to attract a man who is as well cuz I'm like do they want a woman like me? Like I would hope so. But thankfully that's all I've attracted. So

54:15I'm living proof. Okay. That's really good to hear because I feel like it was a it was a switch for me. Um, I don't know what it was, but my sister always had a hard time. She was always the one that made more. Yeah. And then was like, "Okay, well, I just don't believe that I can have someone where I also love their personality and I think

54:32they're funny and they're successful." She just didn't believe that. And I was like, "Why don't you believe that?" And then so now she's gotten so much better at believing that. For me, I was like I I think it was always that part of me that told myself like, "If I'm existing, then someone else is existing." Also, there are men out there, and of course not all of them, but there are men out there that find it very like sexy and hot to have a woman that's also empowered that also doesn't like need them. Like I have the most most of the guys that I've dated, I feel like a part

55:04of them, it's like kind of nice for them to know that I don't need them for their money and I'm also not with them for that, right? Cuz they are used to that. Yeah. Like most of the successful men I've came across are so used to women using them for their money and they like I've never needed them for it which is also like a part of them that's like oh [ __ ] does she like really need me like I have to almost work harder to get I can't just put money in her face and make her so there's also something about that that makes them like like the chase

55:31cuz like when they get successful and they have money it's almost like they have control over a woman now like you need me I'm the reason you go to these nice restaurants and I'm the it's like a little bit of a controlling it's I can do this without you. I really want to go eat here. I'm going to go [ __ ] eat, [ __ ] There's something about that. It takes a very masculine man to be okay with that, though. So, you're not going to attract the guys that are insecure, but they use their money to control and and hide their insecurity. you're going to attract more

56:04men that have to be way more um secure with not having a woman that is needing them financially, which is a different type of man. See, I needed to hear that because I need to just again, this is how I create beliefs. I see other people who've done it and I'm like, "Okay, so if she's done

56:20it, I could do it." But yeah, because I feel like I just Yeah. I've tended to attract men who make less than me, which also makes sense cuz I'm only 24. So like the men I'm dating, you know, like a lot of them are just starting their careers. You're such a baby and you're so wise.

56:32You just blew my mind. You're only 24. Wow. Well, but you whatever. So, some of these guys I'm talking to, I'm like, "Oh my god, Jesus Christ. Like, you just graduated or whatever." You know? I'm like, so it's hard, but um but it's good to hear that they exist. And I think it's interesting cuz I feel like I do the men that I have met who are successful who do feel like they're like, "Oh, women just use me for my money." And I'm like, "Well, you've got to offer something else if you don't

56:56want them to use you for your money. there's there's you if money is the only thing you have to offer a woman then of course you know but they don't have the emotional depth or they don't have you know the whatever it is. So yeah it's it's a really interesting topic. I feel like people aren't talking about it enough even though it's like I think a lot of women nowadays are outperforming men and it's like it's

57:16it's hard. It's something you know cuz I still want to be in my feminine energy. I want to be pursued. I want to be spoiled you know but that's sometimes hard to do when Yeah. And I think it's a very big trigger for men when they hear it because I see it in comments and stuff. But um it comes down to when a woman wants to like have a baby and like now like have that time with their kid like

57:39they need they want to feel safe. Safe. Oh my god. This is the thing. So and this is this is what a lot of people in my life couldn't understand about like my previous relationship is like or just relationships in general. Like the reason I want a man who's well off and successful is for two reasons. It's not because like I'm materialistic or whatever. It's because like from a man what I want is protection and I want safety and I want security as is normal as as is biology and money has forever been like my whole life it has been the root of like me not

58:11feeling safe not being able to get medical care or whatever like stupid stuff but it's like it's prevented me from feeling like fully protected in my life and I always felt vulnerable because I didn't have money. So I feel like of course I want a man who has a lot of wealth so that I feel protected and safe because in the material world a form of safety is wealth right so I think men don't understand that maybe but um some men but and the other thing is I think a man who has I think if he's self-made and he's created a lot of abundance for himself then he's

58:43operating out of an abundance and resourceful mindset which means that no matter the situation with my future children or me or whatever he'll always find a 100%. I've seen that with all successful people like they've always and I they've always and that's what and honestly like dating men that was what were like achieving and stuff has influenced me a lot which is important. I feel like why I like it too. It's like they can see areas in my life they're like hey if you just did this it's nice to have someone that can help you too and it's a very masculine energy to do that. Um, but I was going

59:17to say like the most successful people I've ever met, it's all I've I've met so many of them that are like, I made it and then I lost it all and then I made it again and I lost it all and I can make it again tomorrow. Like and I'm like, wow, that's a real like

59:28level of confidence. Confidence like So yeah, it's like that it's like safety with knowing like, okay, I like I can lean on them when I need to. They'll have my back and like I'll always be okay. Well, that's something I don't think men like give enough grace to is how like how much like having a kid and raising a kid is so much more a woman's job and the amount like we're literally like sacrificing our bodies and like the amount of emotions and

59:58everything that goes into this. Yeah. Shedding our identity, rebirththing. It's like a lot. This is my thing. This is why I will never marry a man who makes less of me because of the simple fact that when you when you have children with a woman as a man, she will always take on like it's not 50/50. There's nothing 50/50 about her having to sacrifice 9 months of her life to carry a child. Literally like I mean I would die for the kid, you know, like like you're giving up your entire

1:00:24identity. That's if you have one kid. Now if you have more that's nine months and 9 months and 9 months and then breastfeeding and like it's also like just your mindset shift as a woman. And it's like when I have kids, I don't think I'm going to want to sacrifice as much time for my career when I could be spending it on my children. And so there's nothing 50/50 about it. And I feel like the only way for a man to make it somewhat equal is based on what he can provide in the physical. Cuz I'm going to be providing in the spiritual, he has to provide in this physical. You

1:00:50know, that's interesting. I never thought about that. Yeah. Like we're we're we're sacrificing our bodies and all these things and they sacrifice. Like I mean it kind of goes back to back in the day like they're the hunters. they go get the food. Like it is it is interesting. But I know it's a very triggering topic. And I think what we can say about it is that there's everything works differently for everyone. Like I've I've have some a friend of mine, they're like they were we were talking about the subject and why it bothered him so much about it and why he got triggered about it was cuz his dad was the one that

1:01:23stayed home and his mom was the one that was very successful and they've worked to this day. So like there is, you know, I think it really comes down to you and like your how you were raised and your beliefs and I don't think anyone should get mad at someone for having that. It's like we all should go after and and and align with what we truly feel we need, you know, and you can't get mad like, oh, all these women just want guys with money. It's like, no, there's also women that don't. So, you know, like you can't get mad at the ones that do cuz then

1:01:54they're just not going to be happy. wouldn't you just want them to be unfulfilled in the relationship? So, we all should go after exactly what we want and and and there's this uh spiritual teacher that I love. I don't know if you've ever listened to her, but she's so like real and I don't I she's not as like

1:02:09mainstream, but her name's Teal Swan. Have you heard of her? I feel like I have. Okay. She's so good. But anyway, she always talks about like whatever dream you have, like if it's to be famous or have a certain amount of money or whatever, she's like go after it. Like you if you have that feeling you have to go achieve it like go after it because that's the only way you will either realize it's not the answer or you will be able to start to grow into like what is your true self will become. Like for an example if you go if you live your whole life and being

1:02:42like shoot I really wish that I you know did that one thing in my career that you always wanted to do and you had that dream and you never did it. You're always going to feel like you you like there's something missing. Yes. But if you go after it, it might not make you fulfilled, but at least now you know. Or it might make you fulfilled and then it makes you become your best version. So like you have to have these these feelings that we're feeling, whether it's to date someone that makes you feel financially secure. All these things are with us for a reason. We need

1:03:12to go after it, have it, so that we can realize all the answers we needed to gain from having that thing. so that we can either evolve or you know Yeah. And I think there's something to be said too about like people's destinies like if you desire something then it is your destiny. I always I've always said desire is destiny because I don't I don't remember who said this but someone once I w was watching a video where this girl was saying like um that like we're kind of like almost like angels from God put on earth or like we're like soldiers of God or like

1:03:43we're like like little like together as a collective we create the universe right but if one person in this collective is not living up to their desire or their calling or what that you know what your higher self is telling you to do then you're denying the destiny of the entire picture almost in

1:03:59a way. Do you know what I'm saying? Because I'm like if I didn't post that first Tik Tok video, I wouldn't have made my Tik Tok account. I wouldn't have started my podcast or whatever. You wouldn't have started your podcast and then thousands of people wouldn't have like learned something that changed their lives. And it's like when you don't listen to your own desires, you're denying other people's destinies. You're like, you know what I mean? And so I'm like, yeah, maybe I want a rich man right now and I think it's for this reason, but maybe it's because I don't know, my future daughter needs to go to this college and

1:04:24she needs to afford it or God knows. You never know. So it's like listen to your destiny and own it. You know, it's a it's your destiny. Desire. It's mainly like not feeling ashamed of your dreams. I think a big thing is like societal like things on like even so many kids now want to be an influencer

1:04:41today. And it's like it's it might be embarrassing for them to say that they want that. But it's like okay if you want that you need to go after it and achieve it to see if it's wasn't the answer or if it was. Like either way you got to go after it. You got to Yeah. living feeling like there's something

1:04:56always missing, you know? Yes. Oh my god. So true. Yeah. Also like why not? That's another thing I don't get is I'm like everyone thinks you have to do a traditional path and I'm like just no you don't. Like you really don't you know and I think it's I think it's sad because I feel like I see so many of my friends who I'm like you would make such a good business owner if you only believed in yourself. And I actually think that's the only difference between I not everyone's

1:05:20meant to be like a business owner. Put that out there. But the people who I think deep down want it and don't go after it. The only thing holding them back is like the belief that they like they can't make it happen or like something internally and that's really sad because it's like it is all mindset.

1:05:34Mhm. It is. It's not you're not missing anything. You just have to post a video. Exactly. You know, so it was so lovely having you on. You're so awesome. I literally am blown away that you're 24. You're so wise. And I just want to say you will find the person of your dreams for sure. You're literally like you're manifesting

1:05:50it now as we speak. And so I'm so excited to watch your journey. Tell everyone where they can find you on social media. Yeah, you can find me at um on Tik Tok, Instagram, Hot High Priestess. My podcast is The Priestess Perspective. And yeah, and you do coaching for manifesting. Tell people about that. I do. If you go on my Instagram, the link in my bio, you can grab my manifest magic workshop. Um I have a couple other programs that'll help you manifest whatever it is you want. They're really

1:06:16good. So, go check it out. Thank you so much. That was so awesome. You're so lovely. Oh my god, you are. Oh my god, that was so good. Yeah, it was amazing. Please comment. Let me know what parts you loved the most and tell me what you want me to speak about next. I read them all. I respond to you all. And please subscribe. This means the most to me to come on here each week and connect with you all. I love you so much. And as you know, I come back every week. So, I'll

1:06:42see you soon.